I'm fed up of my own voice

Half term seems to be particularly grumpy in our house right now, for some reason my children really are starting to clash now - even more than before and I'm so disappointed with it. I see so many happy photos of other siblings and read blog posts about how their the best of friends. I know - don't believe everything you read and life can look happier in pictures than it actually is in real life... I'm fed up of my own voice telling these two off. Why am I telling them off so much? Should I 'ignore' it like my mum said? No, I can't do that. I need to tell them its not ok to behave like this. Michael works 6 days per week - I get three mornings a week without them - Isabelle is at nursery then but by the time I've dropped her and picked her up that's just 2.5 hours of sacred on my own time. This week is half term week so all the things I'd usually do in my teeny tiny bit of time aren't getting done. Michael works so hard and gosh I wish he could be here at home with us more. I wonder if they would behave this badly with him here to 'watch'... probably they would! blahhh. just said blahhh in a blog post - oh dear. it's been a long week.

Well, currently my 7 year old and my 3 year old love each other 10% of the time but the other 90% they're fighting, over a toy, over a pen, over food... over anything they can possibly fight over - they'll do it... hell, they'll even actively go looking for a reason. There's Isabelle pushing Oliver, Oliver pushing her back when he thinks I'm not there! I know this is all probably normal but it does make me wonder whether the age gap with them is just too much for them to get along. I've got siblings whom I don't get along with - they weren't even at my wedding but they're so much older than me... not just 4 and a half years. They should get on right? .... am I wishing for too much?

I was so tempted to write this lovely half term post about my two children who get along so beautifully and share everything every single section of the day whilst skipping along holding hands but that's just bullshit. I'd rather tell it how it is. I've lost count of how many times I've sneaked into the downstairs toilet for five minutes peace pretending to be doing a poo - man those kids must think I've had serious issues this week but I know that poo is the only thing they will leave me alone for and I feel so awful for saying this but it makes me not want to take them out to nice places because I'm left thinking what was the point?

Don't get me wrong - I love them! They're my children but they really do have the grumpiest attitude to life right now and it wears you down, doesn't it? I think I just had to vent that. It's ok to say it... write it... feel it..... grrrr just get along children, they love each other really. Perhaps they're so similar and that's why.

I'm sure it's just a phase, just like every other phase we have had.