Wednesday, 2 March 2016

Children grow up so fast!

Why do children grow up so fast these days?
It feels like 5 minutes ago you were sat in your very first paddling pool which cost me £1 from the pound shop. It was small but it was perfect for you and you were such a sweet baby splashing around, now you're about 6 and a half years old already! I can't believe how fast the years are flashing before our eyes. There's so much I wish we had done together when you were smaller like going on a plane - still haven't been have we? Swimming lessons quicker - you're terrified of water! You still are a genuinely lovely little boy Oliver & I'm so proud of you. Not when you tantrum though, you are soooo annoying when you tantrum over me not giving you a third biscuit!
We had parents evening yesterday for our 6 year old Oliver and I was left thinking wow, I'd of completely failed year 2! Although I'm only 27 - how much can it have changed you think? well, a lot actually and I guess I was a bit taken back at how much is expected of them at such a young age and what worries me even more than that is what's it going to be like when Isabelle gets to year 2? I hope it's not even harder then.

Oliver is struggling a bit with school work and we are going to be helping him even more from now on, I'm hoping to ask Grandma to have Isabelle for an hour a week so I can spend a dedicated hour just me and him learning bits and bobs without a toddler screaming/asking for mr tumble/stealing his pencil. Sometimes I don't like to 'nag' him to do work whilst at home when he's at school doing it 5 days a week - there needs to be lots of playing too doesn't there? Children learn by playing or does that suddenly change when they're 6 and they no longer play? Maybe I need to google that.
Don't get me wrong, I agree with them having to do lots of learning, I want him to learn but I don't want him 'working' all the time at home, I'll get him to do his homework, I'll get him to read his book to me every day and I will spend time testing him on the words he needs to learn each week. In addition to this I'll add in some more time learning about other school bits after school and then spare Saturday mornings he can do some as well, not really sure where else I can 'fit in' extra learning to be honest.

I was really shocked that by at the end of year 2 - which really isn't that far away, he needs to be able to do a big list of things including reading 90 words per minute - say whatttt?! As someone who is actually a really slow reader I think that's just an aim that's out of reach for him at the moment, the poor little chap couldn't even hear properly or pronounce words correctly until last summer. I am hoping everything will just click into place and he'll keep getting better and better.

Yesterday my mum was here and said to me, "why does Oliver keep blinking? Does he needs his eyes tested?" ... he definitely doesn't as he had his first eye test last month and his eyes were fine. We realised that he had also missed the eye test when we moved as his old school was yet to have it and his new school had already had theirs.

So last night when he wouldn't go to sleep, I discovered the reason behind his blinking - he was worn out due to not sleeping much the night before! I kept asking him to tell me but he said no over and over and that it was a 'bad' word so he couldn't. I finally got it out of him though after a cuddle. So a child in his school had been telling him scary things like ghosts and bloody mary! He was in a right state, scared of the fact we had mirrors in our house and he was determined not to go to sleep because he didn't feel safe. The sad fact of the matter is that there are plenty of children out there who aren't 'safe' but for actual REAL reasons not just stupid made up reasons. Thankfully my child is lucky and he's safe tucked up in his bed, so to be honest with you I felt this weird angry reaction and I was, quite frankly furious with another parent somewhere for allowing their child to know such things at 6/7 years old and then to go on to tell my child it too so they're also scared. For someone who
 needs to be concentrating properly at school and not over tired - it's not good is it?
There's so much scary stuff in the world for them to learn of when they're older but for now I really like the idea of him being wrapped in cotton wool, innocent and young because currently we're able to do so. I know these things are made up but he doesn't know that and genuinely worries about them as if they'll happen. I can remember that 'fear' and I don't like the idea of my child feeling it. When did children get so grown up to know things like this?!

 don't let my child play with toy guns at home because to me 'guns' are most definitely not toys. Guns are weapons of war and that cause death or severe pain and they're not something I'd like to see my child using as a toy. He has however been to for example 'nerf gun' parties and my opinion on these are different, its a foam bullet and he's playing with his friends to catch them and put them out of the game - he's not sat at home playing with guns alone.

I don't let him watch anything on TV or any films that I don't think are suitable. He watches documentaries, age appropriate films and still some cbeebies programmes such as footy pups and octonauts.

I don't let him out of my sight if we're out, I apologise if you have to witness me shouting his name if I feel he's gone too far away from me. I had that child, I make the rules thank you very much. I'm the one who is responsible for keeping him safe and what if I let him go further than I thought ok resulting in something bad happening to him? I'd never forgive myself.

I know boys will be boys, he needs to be allowed to do boys things and he is.

Tonight he's watching STAR WARS dvd for the first time and he is really excited. I've got him a bag of popcorn and he literally cannot wait to see what its all about. All his friends appear to be watching it and it was a big step for me to say 'ok' but I figure star wars will be ok! Right?

You can't wrap them in cotton wool for their entire life but I'm a firm believer that at 6 years old you can!

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